Crap.com

When I was a young, I used to sit in front of my mirror with a hairbrush for a microphone and a faux British accent and pretend I was an MTV VJ announcing the next Cindy Lauper or Boy George video. I was also ‘forward thinking’ in that I used to pretend that my ten-year-old life was so exciting that a camera crew would follow me around and tape me as I narrated in my head (an early reality TV show, if you will; “My So Called Brace Face Mullet Mania Life”). Man, if only I’d pitched that! And apparently, I’m not alone – although I eventually grew up and realized that nobody gives a flying rat’s ass about the mundane details of my life.

But, wait a second, I blog! Well, yes, I do! But I like to think that blogging, and writing in general, is more creative than say, tweeting about my gym or bathroom schedule. I don’t always talk about myself of course, and I put minimal personal details in my posts. In fact, my abhorrence for the lack of privacy and stalker facilitation in these Facebook Frenzy times led me to disconnect from all social media sites. I just don’t need people knowing that I recently made a move in Mob Wars or seeing a tagged photo of myself in pyjamas (complete with muffin top) that my mother couldn’t help posting.

So when I read in the New York Times about some new scary social media sites that are starting to creep up (AKA Blippy, which broadcasts news of your credit card purchases, and Foursquare, which publishes your precise location) all I could do was laugh at the pathetic need for people to literally publish everything they do. What’s next? Crap.com (as in, I just took one)?

According to the article, Blippy, both a ridiculous name and concept, even went so far as to side step Amazon (who was blocking Blippy to keep customers' buying info secure) by asking customers to let them access their Gmail accounts in order to take the purchase data from the receipts Amazon had e-mailed them. Does this not scare anyone?

Anyway this got me thinking…if they start taking your purchasing info from your credit card, sites you use or your e-mail account, what if you accidently forget about the Meatloaf CD box set you bought in a moment of weakness, or the Jelly Pleasure your friends convinced you to buy at Ricky’s after a few too many cocktails? There is a whole slew of things people should not know you are buying (Depends undergarments, a recent boob job, Porno, Preparation H, lame work out videos like Tae-Bo, self-help books about being co-dependent, super plus tampons, half-baked desperado wrinkle cream purchases from late-night infomercial, a man bra…the possibility for embarrassment is endless!)

One man was quoted in the article saying he wasn’t worried about the lack of privacy with these new sites because: “I simply have nothing to hide.” FYI: Sure you do, Guy. Everyone does. Even if it’s only your midnight run to CVS for Ex-Lax (extra strength) or your recent online pharmacy Viagra purchase.